Monday, July 20, 2009

Rejoice for the Return of Civil Discourse

Dear readers,
"Anonymous" has graciously posted an apology and a justification, both of which by his/her own prerogative. In my mind it is heartfelt and sincere and I cannot express how greatly I appreciate it. It is a genuine apology for the tone his/her former posts had taken and also a defense of the ideas Anonymous wished to address in a far more respectful tone. As I expressed, I appreciate criticism as long as it is constructive. Anonymous' second posting is just that; if given the opportunity to sit down with anonymous, I am sure I could learn a lot as his/her perspective appears to be far reaching and that of a bird's eye.
I am pleased to post the reply below and would again like to sincerely thank Anonymous for the clarification that is both articulate and respectful.
The purpose of this blog has always been to serve as a way to educate people back home about my perspective on my experiences here. I am humbled to say that this is an opportunity where both myself and my audience have something to learn together.
Thank you,
Sean

Dear Mr. Sean Stanhill, [posted July 19th]

I am deeply grieved that I have caused you such turmoil, Mr. Stanhill. It is not my intention to criticize your service to the Filipino community. In fact, I do not even mention your service to Cabalian in any of my comments. I will, however, admit that my comments were harsh, impolite and unkind, mainly because I have set it in a very disparaging tone. Judging by the sarcastic tone of your open letter, I understand your disgust over my remarks. For these and all insults thereof that I have pinned on your being, I am sorry.

I reiterate that none of my comments condemn your service. All were directed at the perspective you have taken to interpret your experiences. True, you are entitled to your Western perspective, and it is likewise true that there are no vocal criticisms regarding this perspective in Cabalian. This is partly because foreigners are looked up at as figures of authority in Cabalian. This is a status quo that most of us Cabalianons fail to resist. My reaction to your blogs mainly expresses my vehement opposition to this status quo.

Language in the Philippines is a volatile issue. Visayans have an aversion to the largely-Tagalog-centric national language. As you, Mr. Stanhill, must have noticed, Cabalianons are delighted in your presence and your service. In the Visayas, there is a longstanding preference for English over Filipino. When Visayan and Tagalog are mixed, a distortion of the integrity of both languages occurs. It will be seen as an encroachment on one another’s cultural dominion. Mr. Stanhill, Cabalianon (the language we speak in Cabalian) remains to be one of the least unadulterated Visayan languages. Many have entered the mainstream linguistic distortions inspired by the cognoscenti subculture. I do not want this to happen to the language that I have kept even amidst persecutions of being retrograde.

Pardon me for the technical description above. I understand that it is not your intention to introduce distortions to Visayan. After all, you are still in the process of learning the language. What I only ask of you is that, during the course of experiencing the language, please refrain from attaching certain elements which are not endemic to the language. You can always ask the teachers and students around you for advice. My warning about you becoming a laughingstock does not intend to sever you from the community. In Cabalian, joking about the linguistic blunders of others is fairly normal (you can ask some teachers for extant anecdotes about American priests and the funny words they deliver even on the pulpit), even considered a pastime, but I am not sure whether this will be acceptable to you. What would you have thought if you caught them snickering about the added ‘po’? Again, I am sorry for my rude tone in pointing this out to you.

I first commented on your San-Pedro-San-Pablo post because it literally caught my attention. These statements greatly bothered me: “All of the students left to go home for lunch and then, one would assume, to church. But no, St. Peter’s Day is a day in which everyone goes to the beach. That’s right, St. Peter’s Day is a day in which the whole town shuts down in the afternoon to swim.” It sounded as if, by default, Cabalianons prefer excursions over piety on a Catholic feast day. To me this was unfair. I thought of your adopted mother, whom I know as a devout woman. But if she did join the whole town in its preference for the afternoon swim without even considering hearing Mass first, then I will be happy to stand corrected.

Pointing out that your perspective is Western does not at all lead to the conclusion that I detest your presence in the Philippines. Even my advice to you only asks you to shape your judgment accordingly based on all dimensions of your experiences. And again, if I delivered this so insensitively, I am sorry.

And on my last comment, I have roughly dichotomized the distinct construction of Western and Eastern sexuality. In that post, I was merely asking you, albeit in the haughtiest tone I can muster on print, to “expand your database of information” regarding this matter. I can guess that you have discussed this matter with your colleagues during the tilt, maybe even with the contestants and some of the actual bayots themselves who are close to you. But with that second-hand information, none of us is assured of correctness. You see, bayots themselves are conditioned by the society that seemingly looks down upon them. Bayots are either condemned because of their behavior or celebrated because of their creativity. They would think that by joining pageants and tilts they are proclaiming their liberty from the constrictive, rather conventual, society. As an observer in these kinds of social vignettes, I have seen that quite the opposite occurs: They are capitulating to the demands of a society that needs an outlet of their frustrations (under the name of “entertainment”) amidst political turmoil.

My point is that we cannot add more damage to injury, even if the object of injury knows not or even cares less about this.

If you felt you have been beaten to a pulp by these unkind words, I am sorry. I must admit that some of these words were intentional but were invoked only to nail the point. The sarcasm in your words is very biting, but I will try to ignore it. Your friends and family, who thinks very highly of you, have rushed to your aid, to your defense, and this stoked my compunction. I am sorry for causing them to spew undesirable remarks, which I think is contrary to their being. I will try to overlook these condemnations in order to free emotional space.

I am not under the impression that I can undo the damage I have done on your being. I post this response in order to dilute whatever evil I have committed in reacting to your blogs. I will not ask for your forgiveness for these deeds because it only hurts when forgiveness is denied. I will try to move on from this point and close this dreadful chapter.

Sincerely,
“Spineless” Anonymous


P.S. I prefer to stay anonymous. If you still think that my arguments only amount to the blabbering of a 13-year-old, it is not my issue anymore. I have wrought enough havoc under the cloak of anonymity to bug me for the rest of the month. I understand that this is unfair to your person, but I have to choose something in which catharsis can unfold freely. After all, who would wish to acquaint an outspoken, miscalculating faultfinder?

To others who follow this blog: Cudgel me if you like for sounding like GMA in my ubiquitous “I am sorry” tosh. I will perfectly understand your reaction to these circumstances. I know what some of you may think about this: “Thank God, the stuck-up piece of shit has choked in his ignorance and pride!” Do some jumping-jacks and flag me if it pleases your souls. Just think for a second and pose this question: “Is this person’s remorse sincere?” I hope by this you find the victorious relief you are seeking.

3 comments:

  1. Hell ya!

    I think both sides must learn from it!.

    ReplyDelete
  2. Sean, if there is anyway you could stoke this up again, nothing beats reading a good flame war on the internet. Remember what Linus Torvalds, the inventor of Linux says: Entertainment is the highest point of life.

    Keep it real man, I love you,

    Keep the sparks flying it helps the cubicle.

    Fatter Jeff

    p.s. I can't believe I just wrote "keep it real" - automatic language that thinks you without you thinking it. That's one of Orwell's no-no's in Politics and the English Language. But then again Seany Baby, so is using another language to emphasize a point in your own. Its a faux pas.

    Au Revoir.

    P.S. The XBOX is now flashed to read burned games. I figured you'd like that.

    I also think Joseph Heller thinks paradox is the highest form of literature.

    Love,

    JB

    ReplyDelete
  3. I applaud both of you for moving away from the pull of emotional reaction/reactivity and returning to the domain of respectful dialog.
    The world would be a better place if more were willing to do this not-so-simple thing.
    May a lot of GOOD come from this! Rachel

    ReplyDelete

 
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